Oh Joe!

Joe Biden is like that crazy uncle most of us have.  He says things that are wildly inappropriate, stupid, or both and gets away with it because "That's uncle Joe!".  You don't try to understand why he says the things he says, you just embrace it.

Even if you hate this administration you have to admit that Biden keeps things fun.


Joe trying to win an election

"Look, John's last-minute economic plan does nothing to tackle the number one job facing the middle class, and it happens to be, as Barack says, a three-letter word: jobs. J-O-B-S." - Joe demonstrating his ability to count

"A man I’m proud to call my friend. A man who will be the next President of the United States — Barack America!" - Joe introducing his running mate

"Hillary Clinton is as qualified or more qualified than I am to be vice president of the United States of America. Quite frankly, it might have been a better pick than me." - Joe inspiring confidence during a dip in the polls

"You need to work on your pecs." - Joe to a campaign reporter

"Mark my words. It will not be six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy. The world is looking. We're about to elect a brilliant 47-year-old senator president of the United States of America. Remember I said it standing here if you don't remember anything else I said. Watch, we're gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy." - Joe trying to convince people to vote for Obama


Joe on race

"I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I mean, that’s a storybook, man." - Racist Joe

"In Delaware, the largest growth of population is Indian Americans, moving from India. You cannot go to a 7/11 or a Dunkin’ Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. I’m not joking" - Serious Joe


Joe on the job

“It’s easy being vice president — you don’t have to do anything.” - Honest Joe

''His mom lived in Long Island for ten years or so. God rest her soul. And- although, she's- wait- your mom's still- your mom's still alive. Your dad passed. God bless her soul.' - Joe to the Irish Prime Minister

"I would tell members of my family -- and I have -- I wouldn't go anywhere in confined places now. It's not that it's going to Mexico. It's you're in a confined aircraft. When one person sneezes, it goes all the way through the aircraft." - Joe keeping people calm


Joe having trouble with f**king mics

"An hour late, oh give me a f**king break." - Joe finding out his mic is on

''This is a big f**king deal!'' - Joe forgetting his mic is on during the healthcare signing ceremony


Joe just being Joe

''A successful dump!'' - Joe explaining where he was to reporters outside his home

"When the stock market crashed, Franklin Roosevelt got on the television and didn't just talk about the princes of greed. He said, "look, here's what happened." - Joe having some trouble with history.  TVs were still experimental by the time of the stock market crash.

"Uh, uh, Chuck Graham, state senator, is here. Stand up, Chuck, let ‘em see you. Oh, God love you. What am I talking about." - Joe forgetting that people in wheelchairs can't stand up